Zucchini Bread

This is my mom's famous zucchini bread. It's been years since I made it because Jimmy doesn't eat it and it makes 2 loaves, which means I eat 2 loaves of zucchini bread. And as much as I can pretend that it's healthy - zucchini and all, there's a whole cup of oil and 2 cups of sugar in those 2 loaves.
My mom was a pretty good cook. Before she came to the United States, she worked in the Philippines at the US Army Base cooking, cleaning and nanny-ing for American families. I'm a decent cook. I can follow a recipe, modify it and wing it every now and then. But I cook nothing like my mom. In fact, I followed her recipe exactly, well almost exactly, and my zucchini bread looks and tastes nothing like hers. Or how i remember hers to be. Hers was darker and oilier. I'm not sure why mine turned out so light. But I have an idea why mine doesn't quite taste the same. First of all, I'm not a big fan of cinnamon. So instead of 1tsp that the recipe calls for, I only added a little over 1/2 a teaspoon. But I forgot an ingredient that's almost always in baked goods. Vanilla. I've never ever forgotten vanilla in a recipe before so I was kinda worried how it would turn out. How essential is vanilla to baking? Surprisingly and happily, it's still really good. Phew. Have you ever forgotten vanilla in your baking and if so, how'd it turn out?

I asked Jimmy when was the last time he had zucchini bread and he said, when he was a kid. So I had him try another bite. His comment "It tastes like vegetables." Good gravy. I can't even disguise vegetables in a dessert for the man. I'm meeting Angie for lunch tomorrow so I'm giving her the 2nd loaf.

If you like zucchini bread, I recommend trying this recipe. Here are the ingredients.
Yup, I had the vanilla out and everything, but I still forgot it.

And here's my mom's recipe.
Makes me happy that I have this in her writing.

I just realized that her recipe doesn't say how long to bake it. I baked my 2 loaves for 1 hr 25 mins. I started testing it after 60 minutes.
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Reality not my reality

I've been addicted to Jon and Kate plus 8 . I can't even tell you how much I've watched lately. I'm usually not the reality tv type of person, but this summer, I became the reality tv junkie. I think my fascination with their family is how they do it with 8 kids. So impossible for me to put myself in their shoes. Firstly, no kids. Secondly, I was an only child. If you're not familiar with the show, it's a family of 10: the mom and dad, plus a set of twins and a set of sextuplets. The twins are 7 and the sextuplets are 4.

This is me when I was 7:
What's up with that hoe-down outfit? I donno, but I loved it. I remember watching the tv variety show "Hee Haw" all the time. Maybe that's why I loved this outfit so much.

I can't wait for the regular fall tv schedule to start. Maybe I'll stop watching all this reality tv. What shows are you looking forward to? I heard about "Fringe" and I recorded it, but haven't watched yet. Aside from that, just looking forward to my old standbys: Grey's, Heroes, Lost, Pushing Daisies, Ghost Whisperer, etc. Since I fast forward through commercials, I don't even know what new shows are coming out. I need any recommendations you'd like to share.
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Sunflowers

Andie got me thinking of sunflowers the other day and I couldn't help remembering the sunflowers my mom grew for a few years. For some reason she stopped growing them when I was around 7 or 8. But they were so big and gorgeous. In the fall, she would dry out the seeds and bake them with salt.
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Yo, Pop. I miss ya.

I never called my dad Pop. It was always Dad or Daddy or more often Daaaaaaaaad. Anyhoo, with Father's Day on Sunday, I thought I'd do this little tribute to the man who raised me, spoiled me, loved me unconditionally, and taught me patience. He had an abundance of it.

My dad was born in 1904 and lived a mostly healthy 87 years. He came to America when he was 20 years old in the hopes to start a new life, work hard and find the American Dream. He landed in San Francisco first, traveled along the west coast, finding jobs in Seattle, Alaska, Los Angeles and finally in a remote Southern California desert town. Somewhere in between, he became a United States Citizen and served in WWII.

When he began his life in the desert, he worked at a then-famous (built in the 40s) desert resort/inn, catering to many Hollywood types like Clark Gable, Gene Autry, boxer Joe Luis, Phyllis Diller, Gregory Peck, as well as Roy Rogers and Dale Evans who loved the community so much they built their home there.


I have no idea where this photo was taken. For some reason, I have it in my head that it's Seattle. But I'm probably wrong. I'm guessing it was taken in the early 50s.

Again, I don't know where this photo was taken either, but those houses in the background scream Los Angeles to me. Cool car back there, too. Wonder who it belonged to?

At the resort. The pool was kept heated during the winter months. Something very unique back then.

Working at the inn.

Another one at the resort.

Hitting golf balls into the empty desert. Perhaps near his house? At a friends?

Fast forward...oh, 10-15-20? years:
In the mid-to-late 60s, my mom worked as a nanny for the man who owned the desert resort.
Man meets woman (1966), they get married (1967) and a child is born (1968).
He has his first child at the age of 64: me! He's dressed in his work clothes for the inn.

Me again, 1968.

A typical Sunday. Must be 1969.

Sometimes it snows in the desert.

A party where we got all dressed up, Christmas 1970. Possibly at the resort.

Well, when you grow up Catholic, it's expected to get your holy communion when your around 7.

Sometime in the 80s, my dad is honored as one of the very first pioneering Filipinos in the High Desert. Go Dad! PS: Thanks for going there and meeting mom.

At my high school graduation party at the 'resort' which at this time turned into a hokey throwback to the 50s. Too bad. But they still had pretty good food. Pay no attention to the girl with the big glasses and big hair.
edit: Jimmy reminded me that I had contacts and short hair by graduation so this pic was actually taken in 1982 when I was in the 10th grade. By 11th grade I had chopped off that crazy big hair.

Both of my parents walking me down the isle.


Happy Father's Day to all fathers, past and present and all men who have the hearts of father's.
Peace out.
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1973

Apparently the telltale ultra short dress was not unusual in the early 70s. I really was wondering because I would describe my mother as being very modest and showing off my knickers like seems out of character for how I perceived her to be. Congrats to Ragged on guessing the right year! We moved into that house summer of 1972. Based on the new plants and I can tell that it was winter/early spring, that would make it anywhere between Dec 72 - Apr 73. I was 4 1/2 years old. Thanks to all for joining me down memory lane.
I musta been grumpy or something. both photos i'm sporting a little attitude.
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flashback

Any guesses what year this was?
Um, I think my mother put me in a dress made for a 2 year old. It's a tad short, don't you think?
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It was a sunny day in Claremont, California

Just how the heck did 17 years go by in a flash? Must mean that its been a great ride.

The other day we had dinner with the Bowen's at La Fondue to celebrate. Their 14th wedding anniversary this month, too. Have you ever had fondue? Can I just say that it's one of the best inventions ever. Get yourself to a fondue place if you've never tried it. Just be prepared for a long dinner, ours lasted 3 hours. Which isn't nearly enough time to digest all that cheese, meat and chocolate. But the pain is worth it, I promise. :)
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My first Christmas

Obviously I don't remember this, but here I am with my dad oh so many years ago. We lived in the Mojave Desert in Southern California and although the morning sun is shining on us, it must have been a cold day, as all winter days in the desert were. I would have been about 5 months in this photo.
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Fotobooth Flashback

I've been scanning some old photos and found these silly photobooth pics from my junior year in high school. Good times, despite those crazy big glasses.
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The Interview

I couldn’t resist playing when Zann offered up her Interview Challenge. We’re collaborators in an art blog but just getting to know each other on our personal blogs so decided to take this opportunity to get to know a little more about each other. It’d be a lot of fun if you’d like to play along, so lemme know if you do and I’ll send you 5 questions for you to answer on your blog, too.

1. How did you choose your screen name, Madretz?
Mad is the first 3 letters in my first name and Retz is the first 4 letters of my last name. A few people call me that personally but most call me Madeline or Mad. But I don’t like “Maddy.” Makes me cringe just thinking about it

2. What is the biggest life obstacle you've had to overcome?
Ou, this is a tough one. I’m actually gonna have to plead the 5th on the biggest life obstacle, it’s super personal and highly emotional and I’m still going thru “overcoming” it. But my 2nd biggest obstacle is nearly just as tough, and that was losing my mother 9 years ago. The funny thing is that I was closer to my dad, but I was at peace with his passing. I think because my mom died suddenly, so much was left unsaid. Also...I had to make the decision of keeping or taking her off life support and no matter what the statistics are or what the doctors said, I think I will always question the "What Ifs". Phew, that was tough. I’ve never spilled those beans on my blog before.

3. How did you meet Jimmy?
We’re high school sweethearts. We had classes together since the 9th grade but didn’t really become friends till our Jr. year when we sat next to each other in history class. I remember the beginning of our senior year and the first 4 periods, I was so disappointed that I didn’t have any classes with him. Happily, he showed up in my 5th period English class, we sat next to each other and continued our friendship. I was working at KFC (fried chicken anyone?) and he started working there, too. By December in our senior year, we were dating. Been together ever since.

4. What draws you to the medium of photography over other mediums?
I’ve been documenting my life since I was in the 5th grade when I got my first diary and I started taking snapshots around the same time. My first camera was a Polaroid, then in the 80s I got one of those new-fangled disc-cameras – remember those? The quality of the photos were awful, but they were small and fun for a young teenager. It all changed in 1993 when I got a film SLR camera. That’s when I started learning more about the creativity and art of photography. Still, most of my photography is to document the events that have happened in my life: people/places/things. But I take time photographing things that are visually appealing to me. I like framing the shot, paying attention to how light affects something, or playing with depth of field to focus on a certain object or make it blurry. When I switched to digital, I learned so much more because I can experiment without worrying about wasting film. Also, I’m a lot more confident in my photography skills than my writing skills, so my posts will almost always have photographs to accompany what I write. Often, I’ll let the photograph speak for itself.

5. What is your favorite children's book?
Ah. This is easy! The Madeline series by Ludwig Bemelmans. As a child (or teenager in my case), when you discover a book that’s titled with your name, spelled exactly the right way, then it’s gonna be your very favorite. Maybe that’s sort of cheating, so aside from that, I've loved Richard Scarry books since I started reading.

Thanks for the questions, Zann!
Hope some of my bloggy friends want to play, too. :)
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Married 16 years, together since we were babies

Not really babies, but sheesh! Lookie how young we were.

We started dating December 1985 so, wow, we've been together for over 21 years. This is our graduation picture June 1986. Four and a half years after this, we were married at 22.

Happy anniversary sweets. It's been a blast!

2006: Year in Review

January: Yosemite, cabin with friends
February: Race day with the Stutes, Dallas
April: Ashes and Snow in Santa Monica
May: Taylor's birthday, Mothers Day, Ryan at Santa Cruz Beach Boardwalk, Coach Max at NCAA championship game, Ashley's Graduation, Morro Bay & the coast highway
June: Picking berries with the Bowens, volunteering at CKU
July: Dinner with the Bowens, Forth of July, Childrens Tech Museum w/ Machados, San Jose Obon Festival, Capitola for my birthday, Steve and crew at cabin
August: SF Zoo with Bowens, cabin w/ Linda and Andrew, Seattle, cabin w/ Chancey's
September: Meeting Larkin, Bowen kids birthdays, Golden Gate date nite, exploring the high country, Disney 5k race, Kauai
October: Las Vegas, Bob's Big Boy, SF w/ Monica and famiy
November: Hanging w/ Danielle and Taylor, Thanksgiving, Disneyland, Sambos in Santa Barbara
December: misc. roadtrip photos, Christmas, kitty at the cabin

All About Bob

Ya gotta love this guy, dontcha?

On our way home from Vegas on Monday evening, we stopped in beautiful Baker, California for dinner. Usually, we stop at Del Taco (it's history is in Barstow afterall), but we noticed a billboard on the freeway advertising Bob's Big Boy. We haven't been there in years. 5? 10? Something like that. So we had to stop. Our lives depended on it. We were about to wither away because hadn't eaten enough food at the Vegas buffet the day before.

Bob's Big Boy restaurants have just about disappeared in California, or at least it seems like it. Maybe they're having a resurgence. That'd be a good thing as long as they stay in Southern California. I don't need them up here to tempt me. And I'm in S. California enough that I won't be deprived. Like how I'm deprived from Cracker Barrel because they're a Southern/Eastern/Midwestern thing.

In the high desert where I grew up, there was one Bob's Big Boy restaurant. My family only went out to eat once a week, on Sunday after church. Most of the time we'd go to McDonalds or Burger King. On special occasions, we'd go to the sit-down restaurants in town - Bob's Big Boy or Sambos. Admittedly, Sambos was our family's first choice until they went out of business in 1982 but Bob's was a very close 2nd.

When Jimmy grew up, his family went to Bob's often. He remembers going with his family at the crack of dawn, usually before a motorcycle event or space shuttle landing at nearby Edwards Air Force Base. After long work days or long car trips, Bob's was his family's restaurant of choice.

Then when Jimmy and I started dating, it was the restaurant we ate at after senior prom in the wee-early morning. Yes, Bob's Big Boy is a part of our history. It's a little bit pathetic, but it's ours.

Happy Birthday Jimmy!

Hey sweety! (I know you're watching, heehee!!)
Love ya so much.

Jimmy and I met in high school. We had classes together since the 9th grade, but it wasn't until our junior year when we sat next to each other in history that our friendship started. One of my most vivid memories from that history class was right before a test. For the life of me, I couldn't (by myself) remember what OPEC stood for, so I was going to cheat and started writing it on the palm of my hand. Jimmy stopped me and somehow got me to remember what it was: Oil Producing Exporting Country. So engrained, I'll never forget till the day I die. ;)

The beginning of our senior year, we were still just friends. But I remember that first day of school, hoping that he'd be in one of my classes. By the 4th period, he still wasn't in any of my classes. 5th period though, English - yay! there he was. We sat next to each other and our friendship continued. We even worked together at Kentucky Fried Chicken (finger lickin' good!). In November 1985, we started doing stuff outside of work and school together and finally started dating in December and we've been together ever since.

I feel very blessed that I found my best friend so early in life and that through all the years, the challenges haven't separated us, they've made us stronger. That I've been able to spend my most joyous occasions with him and share my most grievous ones, too.

I hope you can handle me for at least another 38 more years, sweety. I know I can't wait to see what the next 38 will bring. We'll be 76! Just Imagine.

There's a party in the sky tonight

Celebrating my dad's birthday. He would have been 102 today.

Thank you!

I just wanted to thank everyone for all of your comments on the last couple of posts I left. I was feeling nostalgic and all of your supportive words really pulled me through!

Jimmy and I are on our way to the oceanside for a bday breakfast.

Me - 37 years ago. 

38 years ago

Tomorrow is my birthday.

I can't help but think about my mother. I spent my entire teenage years battling her. And nearly all of my adult years till she died. It's been over 8 years since she's been gone and I'm just now able to write about her. And damn, do I miss her. I think now that I'm older and not in constant conflict with her, I can see the way we interacted with each other more objectively. I can see her perspective a lot clearer now.

She was strict. Stricter than all of my friends parents. Stricter than my "cousins" (ie: all the other Filipinos in town) parents. She wasn't afraid to smack me around. She used guilt and was good at it. That's how they did it in the Philippines. The problem though, we weren't in the Philippines. I was born in a small, remote desert community about 2 hours from Los Angeles. When I was born, my mother consciously made the decision to raise me as American as possible. She succeeded. A little bit to her dismay. I listened to punk rock and new age music, I watched MTV, the Brady Bunch and John Hughes movies. I talked back (enter the smack across face), I talked on the phone too much, I got my drivers license as soon as I turned 16. I sneaked around behind her back. But I got good grades, almost always made curfew, never did drugs or smoked. Didn't date till I was 17. Went to college and married my high school sweetheart.

We constantly fought. Our relationship was strained. She wanted to beat me into submission. I wanted independence. She wanted me to act like a good Filipino daughter. But she raised a good American daughter. I became exactly the person she wanted me to be, but I didn't have an ounce of filipino-ness in me. She regretted not teaching me the language or customs. She constantly compared to how things were like “back home”. I had no concept of “back home” because this was home.

There were a lot of other things that contributed to our strained relationship, but now that she’s gone, I understand why she did the things she did. We were continuously fighting a cultural battle.

As I approach my birthday, I wonder what she was like before I was born. She died before I could really conceptualize that my mom's life was more than “she grew up poor in the Philippines”. I was still too young and immature. But she was about 36 when she came to California, 39 when I was born. I’ll be 38 tomorrow. I’ve done a lot of living already, and it would be sad if my hypothetical child had no concept of how important those years are to me.

I also wonder what my mom went though when I was born and what I was like as a baby. In the late 60’s it was really unusual for a 39 year old to have a baby. Was she scared? Was her doctor kind? Did she breast feed? Did I cry a lot? How long was her labor? How old was I when I started potty-training?

I also wonder if she were still alive today, would our relationship still be strained? Would I not be able to see beyond our differences?

All this soul-searching has me craving cake and ice cream.

Bring it on!
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July 3, 1967

Today would have been my parent's 39th wedding anniversary. Bless them...getting married in the California desert in July. No wonder their reception was at night.

Coinsidentally, this weekend at the cabin, I was unpacking a bunch of boxes that have been in storage and found my parents cake topper. Gotta love the bride's blonde hair!! heehee! 

Belated Father's Day Post

Me and my dad.
Yup, my dad. Not my grandfather.
He was 64 when I was born.
He'd be 101 now.
As an adult (and now that he's gone) I'm thinkin'...geez, what a stud!
Fathering a kid at 64??

He was my hero.
And he spoiled me rotten (to my mother's dismay - she ruled with an iron fist).

And, theoretically, I'm his only kid.
But there are a lot of years that he was a Single.Man.

Grew up an only child.
Now I can't help but wonder...